I know that i'm not going to get the one thing i really want for Christmas.....
But i'm going to keep waiting until the time is right.

i listen to this over and over again.....

I want this to be over with

Because of you i dont believe any people anymore.

I know that most are not like you, but I have that fear that they will do to me again what you have done.

That they will not show up. That they will disappear. That they will lie to me.

I hate that you have made me feel this way. I hate that you have had any effect on me at all.

I want to be able to just dismiss you like you never existed, like you were just a bad dream that will be forgotten as soon as I wake up.

barr.. hum bug!!

yes.... i am drunk. but i sick of it! for the last 4 years i have been the constant single one in my group of friends. and im sooo over it. ive had enough of sitting there quietly while they all kiss and cuddle whle im there watching the band.. prentening that im having a great time while all i want to do is crawl up into a ball and cry.
im over it! how do my gf always manage to find the guys that are happy to commit while i attract the palyers.
grrrr... ive had enough... no more!
as of pay day things are goign to change...just how is a secret that only i know, but they are going to change! no longer will i be the only single lonely one at the table... in time things will be different. they have to be.

What not to use....

This afternoon at work i was entertained by an impromptu and somewhat badly played game of office cricket....tho most of the time i was just trying to keep out of the way in order to not get hit by the orange squishy stress ball. How ever we did discover that the lid of an esky, a large sized umbrella and an empty glenfiddich scotch container all do not make awesome cricket bats.
.. just in case u ever should find urself stuck desperate for some form of cricket bat, i do not recommend these things at all.

lies, lies, lies.... all your lies.

Its been nearly 2 weeks since i heard from you.

Is it wrong that the only reason i want to hear from you is so that i can tell you to leave me alone?

i dont want you to win, to think that you ended it. i want you to know that I made that decision, not you.

You told me that you 'cant not have me' and you dont want to lose me'.. you never had me and you cant lose something you never had.

Its all your own fault as to why u never had me, i was there for. i waited for you. but it was never enough, for a reason ill never know. but i have decided that i dont want to know.. cos it doesnt matter anymore. All that matters is that i know i dont want you anymore.

im better than how you ever treated me, not that you will ever get the chance to see....

bored, bored, bored

i have nothing much to do today.

As usual you have another excuse to not spend the day with me as u promised. You say u will see me later but i dont believe it.

makes me wonder if you believe ur own lies when u tell me them?
y say u will do something if you have no intention in the first place?

im not sure what u really want from me, but then i dont think u do either.

hmmm... bored, bored, bored.. nothing to do today, but be annoyed at you.