Note to self

current mood: I'm an idiot!

If you are bored in the afternoon and notice that ur mouse pad has a pen mark on it....

IGNORE IT!

Do not colour the whole mouse pad in with black permanent marker as to disguise the pen as this will result in u getting a black wrist!

1 down....

I said that i was going to get back into the dating thing, in order to find someone to cuddle. I have gone on my first attempt of a date.
Although i dont think i should be classing this one as a date. He took me to McDonalds, yes u read correctly! Apparently thats what he felt like eating. He had just come from footy training and was hungry. What makes this, date (i use this term loosly) even worse was that we didnt go into maccas, but the drive through then sat in the car and ate!
If this 29yr old BOY thinks he is getting a second date, he is dreaming. Who takes a girl to maccas for a date!
i live near the city for fks sake... not like there is a lack of cafe's and restaurants around.
Neways, getting a tad annoyed.. need to calm down. lol

So this guy wasnt exactly what i was looking for in a partner, but he was a good little ego boost for me, as he did want to see me again. :)

Lets just hope that the next one has a bit more class shall we. :)

wooo

comments are working now.. ppl.. comment ur asses off :)

comments

My comments dont seem to be working.... i have fiddled with a few settings.. lts try now....

im in love

Current mood: happy :)

Friday night was spent with a man that at one point in time, was my whole life.
Although the night wasn't about love for each other in that way anymore. Lying in his warm arms made me remember just how much i used to love this. The soft kisses on my forehead for no reason when i put my head on his shoulder, hearing his heart beat along with my own. i love this feeling of love.

Waking up with him the morning to him cuddling me to keep me warm, made me feel so safe, so protected, so happy. a feeling that i have not felt in a very long time. This was what i needed to remind me.

Over the last 2 years that i have been single, i think i must of forgotten how much i loved the feeling of being in love.

i have decided i want that feeling again. it has taken 2 yrs but i am ready to try and get that feeling back.

I am happy that i am finally at this point. and i am finally, in love with love again! :)

Alone....

Current mood: upset :(

2 weeks ago one of my bestest friends ilz left me to move to Turkey, he is never coming back. He has moved there for ever. Forever is a very long time to never see someone again!

Today one of my other close friends hays, that i also work with finished up today as she is moving back to the gold coast where she is from. I organised a big lunch for the company to say goodbye to her and it was all very sad... lots of tears.

and in 3 weeks another close friend and my exhousemate, Beck is moving to QLD aswell!

3 of the closest people to me are all leaving in the space of 2months! how is this possible!!!!

i am a wreck! who am i meant to turn to now?

Usually it would be ilz that i would be calling in times of dispear. he would answer my call and just know that i needed him to come over, i wouldnt have to say a thing.. and he would be over, he would make me laugh, give me cuddles and id be happy again. Now he is on the other side of the world. ....... i miss him.

If one more person decides to move away anytime soon... i dont know what im going to do.

Learning to save is my mission and i must succeed!

I really want to go over seas and travel. I want to do this next year.
but i realised this morning that next year is approching at an alarming rate.

I need to get my life orgainised. i have to get my money situation sorted.
i have come to the conclusion that i am shit when it comes to saving! But i am trying which is always a good start. i no longer impulse buy.. at least now it is rare & something cheap when i do :)

i like my job.... i do. but im BORED!!!! i want to discover new things....

Pyschic mp3 player?

"Simple directions: use the shuffle function on your music player andsee what you come up with in answer to the following questions."

These are the answers I got. Some depressing, some funny.. others just confusing lol

How does the world see me?
Stick with you – Pussycat Dolls

Will I have a happy life?
Without you - Eminem

What do my friends really think of me?
She got that vibe - Mic

Do people secretly lust after me?
This years love – David Grey

How can I make myself happy?
Nasty Girl - Nitty

What should I do with my life?
Murder was the case – snoop dogg (*the answer to this one scares me a little)

Will I ever have children?
I see girls – Studio B

What is some good advice for me?
Breakdown – Bone thugs n harmony feat Mariah Carey

How will I be remembered?
Soldier – Destiny’s child

What song will play at my funeral?
So Sick – Ne-yo (is this y i will die perhaps?)

What type of men do I like?
Seven - Prince

What is my day going to be like?
The pieces don’t fit anymore – James Morrison

i think the universe is trying to tell me something

ok... so i was going to tell you what i woke up to this morning.

For some dumb reason this morning in that half awake half asleep state before my alarm (the radio) clicks on, i started thinking of my ex-boyfriend that i have been broken up with for 2 years now. this was not an easy break up, i was left heartbroken.. and still am rather. i think of him often still and what could have been if we had met under different circumstances. If we had met earlier before she came into his life and ruined everything for him... for us.

As i dreamt about him... my alarm came on.. with the lyrics to some grunge song i dont know playing on Nova saying "it's over now, get over it".

im taking this as a very obvious sign that the univers believes i need to move on & get over him and i do agree, but unfortunatly, this is easier said than done... but im getting there.

Welcome to my first post!

This is the first post to my new blog. im not sure why i have even started this, i just woke up (to something that i will explain next) and felt the need to write my life down and how i am feeling as i am staring to get a bit lost in myself. If i put these feeling down in writing im hoping it will help me start organising my life to the way i want it to be, and i can stop feeling so lost.

Or perhaps my housemate Dale has had some profound effect on me, and im starting to see how writing things can help.

either way.. im open to trying new things. :)